Never say never
by Miss92
Summary: Lily Evans had been told to never say never, but she had never expected her life to take such an unexpected twist.
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone,

I'm terribly sorry for not updating anything on this site for such a long time. I've truly missed it and I promise you I will update my other stories as soon as possible as well, but I am first posting this. This is the first chapter to my new story called "Never say never". I suppose this, the prologue, is rather lighthearted, but I have to warn you all: this won't be lighthearted. At least, I don't have the intention to keep this as lighthearted as this chapter. So, prepare yourselves.

Thank you for all of your support on my other stories, if you have read them, and I hope you will like this one, because I can tell it's already dear to me. Please leave a review to let me know what you think.

Love,  
Me

**Never say never**

Prologue: Meeting Lloyd Davies

I couldn't stop smiling. The smile had crept on my face when I first started reading the letter I had just received and it hadn't left now I was reading the letter for the tenth time. It was possibly the sweetest, cutest, most adorable letter I had ever received in my life and I almost swooned when I read the last sentence for the tenth time.

_I cannot wait to see you smile at me._

It was by far the most beautiful line she had ever read. Not a clichéd 'I cannot wait to see you', but an 'I cannot wait to see you smile at me'. Have you ever read something more beautiful coming from a guy's quill or pen? I didn't think so, yes.

I started to read the letter for an eleventh time and I had only read past the first paragraph when I was rudely interrupted by – who else – James Potter.

"… right, Evans?"

My head snapped up and I looked up at him. He was grinning his weird lopsided grin and his eyes were sparkling behind his glasses. He was most likely talking about Quidditch then, seeing his eyes always sparkled whenever he talked about it. It was probably best to agree with him.

"Right, Potter," I said and I turned back to my letter, not really caring what I had just agreed on. Because honestly, who would care about such stupid matters when they had the sweetest love letter in the century in their hands?

"Oh, I wouldn't start cheering yet, James," said my friend, Marlene. "She probably didn't even hear what you were saying." I looked up, suddenly interested. What had I just agreed on?

James laughed loudly. "Of course, she heard what I was saying! Right, Evans?" He looked at me expectantly and I bit my lip. His face turned blank. "Oh."

"Don't worry about it, James," said Marlene with a roll of her eyes, "she never pays attention to anyone when she's reading a letter from her lover."

I started to blush. "I was paying attention," I mumbled and looked out of the window, ignoring all the looks people were sending me. "I just didn't hear Potter." Then someone took the letter from my hands and I almost jumped up. "Give it back!"

"Don't worry, Evans," said Sirius Black, who was eyeing the letter with interest, "I am merely checking out James' competition!"

I stood up, walking towards Sirius Black and holding out my hand for him to return my letter. "Give it back, I mean it!"

Sirius' eyes then started sparkling as well. "Oh, Prongs," he said, "Evans here is into the sappy kind of guy. 'I cannot wait to see you smile at me.' Isn't that just romantic?"

I took the letter from his hands and glared at him. "It's not sappy," I said angrily.

"Who is this guy you're writing with?" asked James Potter and I turned around and glared at him as well.

"None of your business, Potter," I said and folded up the letter.

"His name is Lloyd," said Marlene, sounding rather excited, "she met him last summer when she was shopping with her mum in London. She almost fell off the stairs, but Lloyd came to the rescue and stopped her from falling!"

James snorted. "Lloyd? Seriously?"

"Yes," I said, "seriously."

"Sounds like a bit of a pansy to me," said Peter Pettigrew with a wide grin on his face, but he cowered away once I directed my glare at him.

"Pansy or not," said Marlene, "he has captured Lily's heart." I now directed my glare in Marlene's direction. She was talking far too much today. Marlene only smiled at me. "But Lily, it's true and very romantic!"

I knew I had started blushing and quickly sat down on the floor, trying to ignore the curious looks on the boys' faces. "We are just writing," I mumbled, "that's all."

"Oh, come on, Lily!" said Marlene. "You're staying with him for the summer!"

"Because he promised to show me around London!" I said and felt the blush on my cheeks deepen.

"You're staying with a guy you have only written to?" asked James Potter and I could see the disbelieving look in his eyes. I almost wanted to tell him that, yes, I am indeed staying with a stranger, doesn't that piss you off? But I decided against it.

"He spent the Easter holidays at my place," I said simply, "my parents think he's a good guy, so you don't have to worry about me, Potter."

He frowned. "So, you think you know him?"

"Of course, she knows him, James!" said Marlene. "She has been writing with the guy for over a year and they're practically perfect together. You should read his letters. He's the perfect gentleman."

"I just don't think you should completely trust someone just because you've been writing with him or her," said James, "he could be a creep in real life!"

I huffed. "Well, Lloyd isn't like you, Potter," I said and James glared at me.

"I'm merely warning you, Evans," he said, "it would be better if you stayed with me for the summer."

I laughed a rather scary laugh. "Oh, yes," I said and rolled my eyes, "staying with you for the summer would be absolutely perfect, of course. No danger there!"

Marlene stepped in before James and I would start another humongous fight. "Yes, well…" she said, "if Lloyd turns out to be a creep – he won't, by the way – Lily will come straight to me and I'll be staying at your place, James… so, then she'll be at your place too!"

It was quiet for a while and I silently thanked Marlene on my knees. She truly is the best friend a girl can have. She has never disappointed me or let me down. She always knows what to say, she is very kind and enthusiastic and she's brilliant at Ancient Runes, I have no idea how she does it, really.

"So," said Sirius Black after a while, "sounds like we're all going to have a fantastic summer." I couldn't contain my grin and was about to agree wholeheartedly when James Potter suddenly stood up.

"I'm going up," he said rather moodily and before I knew it he was gone. Out of sight. I didn't know what his problem was. I really didn't understand that boy.

"Uhm…" said Sirius Black and he looked at his two other friends, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew, "we should go up as well." And without explaining themselves any further they followed their friend.

I looked at Marlene, my eyebrows raised, but Marlene looked at her hands, seeming rather uncomfortable. "Boys are so confusing," I finally said and Marlene looked up, smiling slightly.

"Yes," she said, "they are, aren't they?"

I then smiled at Marlene. "Do you want to read Lloyd's letter? It's the most beautiful one he has ever sent me, I swear!"

Marlene then sighed. "You know what, Lily?" she said. "I would love to read it and I'm sure it's a fabulous letter, but… you really hurt James."

I rolled my eyes. "He'll get over it."

"No," said Marlene, "I don't think he will. He really likes you, Lily."

"Well," I said, starting to feel angry, "I will never like him."

Marlene stood up and shook her head. "Really, Lily," she said, "you should never say never."

* * *

The next morning had arrived before I even knew it. After that awkward conversation Marlene and I had I went to sleep and woke up the next morning to see Marlene smiling at me again. I felt relieved, because I had seriously thought she was very angry with me and I really didn't want her to be angry with me or me to be angry with her.

We ate breakfast and then hopped onto the Hogwarts Express. Finally riding home. Or well… home? I was going to Lloyd's home and I couldn't help but think that this was going to be the best summer in my life. Lloyd and I were so… good together. I had never felt more complete around a boy than I felt around him. He might just be the one, I had thought on numerous occasions and I could already see myself wearing a beautiful white dress… Mrs. Lily Davies.

Lloyd and I had met each other at Harrods. I had been shopping there with my mum last summer after visiting Diagon Alley and because I'm such a clumsy person I almost fell down the stairs. Luckily, Lloyd Davies had been there in all his gorgeousness and he had offered me and my mother a drink.

We exchanged addresses and after that… well, we wrote and we wrote and we wrote and… he visited me during the Easter holidays and he looked fantastic. My dad loved him, my mother adored him, and even Petunia seemed to like him. He was everything I had wanted, everything I had needed, he was perfect in absolutely every single way.

As you can see, I had every reason to be excited about meeting him and this was why I almost jumped off the Hogwarts Express and started running towards the exit. I felt my heart beating ten times as fast as its usual pace and once I stood at Kings' Cross I craned my neck, looking around in order to find him as soon as possible.

"Evans," I quickly spun around, expecting Lloyd, but there was James Potter. His hand in his neck and looking rather nervous. "I just… wanted to tell you I'm sorry for behaving like such a prat yesterday. I'm sure you'll have a wonderful summer."

For the first time in years I smiled at him. "Thank you, Potter," I said and I wanted to say more, but then I saw him. Lloyd Davies. He grinned at me and I had never seen a more perfect sight.

And before I knew it I was in his arms, kissing him lightly on the lips. "I've missed you so much!" I squealed as Lloyd wrapped his arms around me and lifted me up in his arms.

"I'm happy to see you smile, Lily," whispered Lloyd as he pressed his lips against mine and I giggled.

That moment I knew Lloyd Davies was the best I could ever get. Lloyd Davies was the perfect man for me and we would get married, have at least three children and would be happy together for the rest of our lives.

I didn't even notice James Potter looking at me with slumped shoulders and a blank expression on his face and that was saying something.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 1: Not so perfect

The Davies' family was perfect. Absolutely perfect. They all shared the same honey blonde hair, the same winning smile and the same perfect kindness. They were so perfect it almost scared me, well, actually it did scare me.

I was sitting on the couch in the living room, smiling as Lloyd's father told me an anecdote from his work and I laughed at the right moment. At least, I think I did, because I laughed at the same time Lloyd, his mother and his sister laughed.

Lloyd's sister… she as honestly the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. Her honey blonde hair shone perfectly, her dark blue eyes sparkled and her cheekbones were the most outstanding ones I had ever seen. She almost looked like a fairy. She probably would have attended Beauxbattons if she hadn't been a Muggle. That's how pretty she is and it was honestly quite intimidating.

"Lily," said Lloyd's mother, "Lloyd told me you attend a prestigious boarding school in a town called Hogsmaede, is that right?" Lloyd's mother sipped her tea. Her red lips quickly sending me a smile.

"Uhm… yes," I said and I smiled as well, "it's a very nice school."

"How lovely," said Lloyd's mother, "but how dreadful it must be to be away from home for so long. I wouldn't be able to bear it."

"Well," I said, feeling nervous, "it almost feels like home, so I don't really mind staying there all year and I get to go home during the holidays."

Mrs. Davies nodded. "I see," she said.

I nervously bit my lip. I see? Is that meant to be a good response? I don't know! These people are so perfect, so reserved. How am I supposed to know what to say? How am I supposed to know what they say and what they mean when they say 'I see'?

Okay, I'm panicking. Just slightly for your information. It's not as though my eyes went wide and my hands started shaking.

Okay, maybe my eyes did go wide and maybe my hands were shaking slightly, but that has nothing to do with the fact I'm nervous and panicked and… ugh!

"Olivia," said Lloyd's mother then, "why don't you show Lily her room?"

Olivia, Lloyd's sister, immediately stood up and I did so too, feeling quite relieved now I was leaving the living room and walking up a flight of stairs behind Olivia.

She stopped at the first door on the right and opened it. "I hope you like flowers," she said, her voice sounding like a beautiful melody.

I only nodded and walked into the room, looking around me. "Yes," I said, "I do."

Olivia only smiled and excused herself, closing the door behind her and I suddenly felt very much alone.

* * *

After spending four weeks with the Davies' family I have come to the conclusion that it's scary to meet perfect people. They get up at seven o'clock every day, so they don't waste it. They look absolutely radiant every day, they are absolutely kind every day and they give me everything I want every single day.

Yet I don't feel like this is the best summer ever. I don't feel like Lloyd is the best thing that ever happened to me and I feel so guilty about it all, because he is. He absolutely is the best thing that could ever happen to anyone.

He showed me around London, making sure I had seen all the famous spots. He took care of me, making sure I ate and drank enough. He showed me he loved me very much, by saying 'I love you' at least five times a day. Last Monday he even said it twelve times, I counted. But still it doesn't really seem to be enough for me. I must be a spoiled brat. There is no other explanation.

"Lily," said Lloyd and I noticed the door open out of the corner of my eyes. I was just brushing my hair and I sent him a smile.

"Hey," I said and patted on the bed, asking him to come and join me, "did you sleep well?"

He smiled also. "Very much so," he said and then he sent me a somewhat stern look, "you slept in rather late."

I bit my lip to hold back my laughter. "Lloyd, it's 8 o'clock," I said and I laid down my hairbrush, playfully swatting him.

"Your pancakes are cold," Lloyd said very seriously.

"I don't mind them being cold," I said and we were silent for a while as I put on my shoes. Then I looked up and smiled at him. "Really, Lloyd, I don't."

He seemed to feel a bit more relaxed after hearing this and I stood up, holding out my hand for him to take and he softly kissed me on the lips. "I just want you to have a good time," he whispered and I felt guilty again.

"I know," I said, "and I'm having a very good time."

We walked down the stairs and into the kitchen to find Olivia reading the newspaper. "Good morning," she said as she sipped her tea and smiled at the both of us, "did you sleep well, Lily?"

"Yes," I answered her, "thank you."

"That's good to hear," she said and then handed me an envelope. "This was on the kitchen table when I came down this morning. It's addressed to you."

I took the envelope from her and frowned slightly at the handwriting. It was definitely male and I had seen it before, but I couldn't quite place it. "Oh," I said as I opened the envelope and soon started to read the letter in it.

I stopped breathing for a second and then let go, folding the letter up and smiling up at Lloyd and Olivia. "It's just a letter from a friend of mine," I said and I stood up, leaving the pancakes Lloyd had just placed in front of me untouched. "I should answer it."

I almost ran up the stairs and closed the door to my room behind me, jumped on the bed and folded the letter open again. Reading it for the second time.

_Lily,_

_I suppose it's a good sign you didn't turn up on my doorstep yet. It means he is not a creep. Yet I hope I will see you soon. Preferably very soon._

_James_

It was the shortest letter she had ever received. She wasn't even sure if she should call it a letter. Wasn't it more of a note? And he had called me Lily… he had never done that before.

My head was spinning slightly and I bit my lip. He's such a bloody prat. What was wrong with him? Why would he send me a letter or note containing… nearly nothing.

I let out a frustrated sigh and folded up the letter again, placing it on my pillow.

James Potter was the weirdest guy on this planet, I swear.

* * *

Lloyd and I were sitting on the couch, watching a random TV show I wasn't really paying any particular attention to. I was just staring ahead, thinking about… things and was completely surprised when Lloyd decided to ask me something.

"What was the letter about?"

I looked at him and frowned slightly. "What letter?"

"The letter you received a week ago? The one that caused your mood to drop?"

I raised my eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

Lloyd sighed and shrugged. "Just that ever since that letter came you've been very quiet. So, I'm wondering what the letter was about and what about it made you change so much."

I looked at him, my eyes rather wide. "The letter was from a friend and it was about absolutely nothing." I had not lied, well, a bit, because James Potter wasn't really my friend, but the letter had been about nothing.

"Oh, please," Lloyd then said, "that friend of yours basically begged you to go to him and leave me."

I gasped. "You read my letter?"

"Yes!" Lloyd almost yelled. "I was concerned, so I had to read it."

I looked at him. His honey blonde hair was sticking up a bit and his eyes were tired, but staring angrily at me. "Well," I said, "I'm still here, aren't I? That must mean I am not interested in leaving you."

"You are," Lloyd said and he stood up, "I can see it in your eyes, Lily, so don't act indifferent to that guy's offer."

"I kind of hate him, Lloyd," I told him, standing up as well, "so I'm really not that interested."

Lloyd stared at me and he sighed. "I don't think you are that uninterested."

"I think I am," I said firmly and Lloyd looked me in the eye.

"Just think about it, Lily, I don't want you to stay, because you think you have to."

With that he left the living room and I sat down on the couch again, staring at the TV, but not really watching at all.

* * *

The next day it was Thursday. I had woken up at 9 o'clock and when I had entered the kitchen I noticed a note on the table, saying Lloyd and Olivia had gone out to get the groceries.

For a moment, I stared at the note, but then I turned around. Packing my suitcase, not really knowing what I was doing at all before I started to write a note myself.

_Thank you so much for everything. I'm visiting a friend, so don't worry._

_Lily_

I placed the note on my bed and with a swish of my wand a lily appeared next to it. And then, before I even knew it, I apparated to the first place that came to my mind.

I was in a carrousel. Turning and turning, my head spinning and my stomach acting as though I was in a roller coaster and then it stopped and I stood in front of a house and I knocked on the door, waiting and looking at my feet. I suddenly felt very nervous.

"Evans?" the door had opened and there he stood, my sworn enemy, the guy I couldn't stand, the guy that I would never even consider dating. But he was there, staring at me and looking at me with a confused and somewhat concerned expression in his eyes.

"You were right," I then said and my voice was so soft, that I was sure he almost couldn't hear me. "He wasn't a creep."

He looked at me. Something changed in his eyes and he picked up my bag. "Come on in," he said, "my mum will have a guestroom ready before you even know it."

I was most grateful and I whispered a small and soft 'thank you'. He merely shrugged, put down my bag and reached for my coat. I handed it to him and looked at my feet.

"Lily?" a disbelieving, but excited Marlene asked and I felt two arms wrap around my shoulders. "Oh my! What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be with that fantastic boyfriend of yours?"

I didn't know what to say. Should I tell her I had left, leaving only a note behind?

"He went to see his family," said James, "and Lily decided to join us before going back to Hogwarts, right Lily?"

I only smiled and nodded at Marlene. Marlene squealed and repeated over and over again that she was so happy there would be another girl around now. Apparently boys are quite disgusting when you spent day in day out with them.

Marlene entered the living room, practically jumping up and down as she told Sirius, Remus, Peter and, shockingly, James' parents that I had arrived. They all greeted me, James' parents shook my hand and James' mother immediately went to the kitchen to make me some tea.

I was overwhelmed. I didn't know what to think. To be quite honest, I didn't think. I merely hoped that Lloyd and his family would forgive me for just… disappearing.

I sat down on the couch. James sat next to me and quite unexpectedly he took my hand in his and he squeezed it lightly. I looked at him out of the corner of my eye and made sure he saw me smiling at him, reassuring him that I was fine.

And I could see it in his eyes. He understood. He understood that I was not so perfect as I wanted him, and everyone else, to think.

And I laughed. And I drank tea. And I felt guilty, but I never showed that to anyone.

Though I knew James could see.

* * *

Author's note: This wasn't the most exciting chapter I have ever written, but it was necessary. The next chapter will be much better. I promise! Please leave a review and let me know what you think!


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note: **  
I am so sorry! I honestly thought I had posted this chapter last week, but apparently I haven't. I was writing chapter 4 and thinking about uploading it when I noticed I hadn't even posted this one yet. So, I'm terribly sorry for the delay!  
I hope you'll enjoy this one! Please leave a review and let me know what you think!

Chapter 2: Stupid girl

"So," he said as he leaned against the doorpost, "this is your room."

I nodded and looked around the room. It wasn't too big, it wasn't too extravagant, but it looked beautiful. Mrs. Potter had put flowers on the bed stand and the window offered me the most beautiful view of the back garden.

"The bathroom is behind the door across your room," he said, "we're sharing it, but I don't think that will give you any trouble."

I turned around to look at him. His black hair had grown a bit longer over the two months I hadn't see him and there was something in his eyes that seemed different. But other than that he was still the James I had left behind at Kings' Cross. I sighed.

"I'm sorry," I said. He seemed confused. "For walking away like I did when you were talking to me at Kings' Cross."

There was a smile tugging at his lips, but he didn't break out in a genuine smile. "That's what you're concerned about, Evans?"

I shrugged and turned around, kneeling down in front of my bag. "I didn't want to fail," I said, rather suddenly and I looked at him over my shoulder. "I really wanted my relationship with Lloyd to work, but I failed." He took a few steps towards me and kneeled down beside me, opening my bag.

"No, you didn't," he said and then grinned at me, "you ended up here, didn't you?"

We hadn't talked about anything yet, yet I knew he understood. He knew what had happened. He knew that Lloyd and I hadn't been meant to be. He knew I hadn't wanted to leave in the first place, but most important of all he knew I wasn't perfect.

I studied him for a few seconds. "How is it you know me so well? How is it you know exactly what to say to me?" I asked him curiously.

He was picking up a book from my bag and studied the cover for a while. "We're alike," he said and then he looked up at me and my heart skipped a beat, "you don't like that, do you?"

"What?" I asked him and he grinned.

"That we're alike," he said and he placed the book in my bag again.

"I don't know if I like it or not," I admitted and I offered him another smile, "it makes things easier though."

He seemed to think about this for a minute and then he sat down on the floor, leaning against the bed, my bed. "What did you like most about London?" he asked.

I almost laughed. I was relieved. He wouldn't start asking questions, because there are just some things James and I don't talk about. Don't need to talk about, apparently, because we're so alike and he knows what I'm feeling or thinking. It's scary in a way, but very comforting in another.

"I really liked Buckingham Palace," I told him and leaned against the bed as well. "I don't know, there is something magical about royalty, don't you think?"

He smiled. "Yeah," he said, "I do." Then he looked at me with a serious expression on his face. "I know you don't want me to ask, but do I need to beat him up?"

I didn't want him to ask that, but I understood that he asked anyway. "No," I said, "He's a really good guy and he treated me very well." James nodded and smiled at me.

"That's good," he said and he leaned against my bed. "You're kind of stupid, Evans," he said and he looked at me with a fierce look in his eyes, "you would have had lots more fun if you had stayed the whole summer with the others and I."

I nodded and couldn't help but smile. "I suppose so," I said.

"You're such a stupid girl," he said again and he shook his head, his glasses sliding down his nose slightly.

When he looked at me again I couldn't help but put his glasses back in place again and my fingers softly brushed his cheeks. There was stubble on them and I felt a smile tug at my lips. He had changed more than I had thought.

He stared at me and then his hand softly brushed my hair out of my face, lingering near my ear for a few seconds and then he took a deep breath. "You are staying with me for the next few holidays," he said.

I smiled and he stood up, leaving the room. Before he closed the door, however, he sent me a stern look. "Sleep," he said and I was alone, but I didn't feel alone at all.

* * *

"Lily," I heard a soft voice say and I opened my eyes to find Marlene smiling down at me, "hi, we're having dinner."

I looked at my watch and noticed I had slept for almost three hours. I sat up and my hands flew up to my hair, trying to tame it slightly.

"I'm so happy you're here," said Marlene and she sat down on the bed, smiling broadly at me. "I'm surprised, of course, but so happy!"

I nodded and then looked her in the eye. "Lloyd is not my boyfriend anymore." There. It was out. She was my best friend, she deserved to know and she should know. "I kind of left his apartment this morning."

Marlene stared at me for a second, her face completely blank and then her mouth formed an almost perfect 'o'.

I stood up from the bed and quickly examined myself in the mirror that hung against the wall. My hair looked all right, I looked all right. It should be enough. We were only having dinner.

"You just left?" asked Marlene and I turned around. "Why… I don't understand. James told me Lloyd went to see his family and that you had decided to join us and you nodded, you agreed with him."

I sighed. "He was playing the gentleman for once," I said and rolled my eyes, "I didn't really want you to know just then."

"But…" Marlene was looking at me as though she had never seen me before. "You're heartless, Lily, how could you just leave him? Are you mad? You were perfect together, remember?"

I took a deep breath. "I was fooling myself, Marlene," I said and her eyes went wide. "He was perfect and I wasn't and it just didn't work for me."

"Didn't work?" she asked, her voice high. "You were in love, remember, every single time he wrote you couldn't stop thinking about him!"

I shrugged. "He was just a very good writer, I suppose, I fell in love with his writing and the I met him and I realised he wasn't what I expected from his writing."

Then Marlene's arms were around me. "You stupid girl," she said and hugged me close, "You probably broke that poor boy's heart."

I smiled slightly and returned the hug. "I know," I said, "I was being incredibly selfish when I left."

"You were!" Marlene said firmly and she shook her head. "But let's go and have some dinner. Mrs. Potter is the most amazing cook, I swear!"

"I'm ready to find out if you're right," I said as I made my way for the door.

A few minutes later I found myself sitting at a large table in the Potter's dining room. Sirius Black was eating as though he hadn't in days and Peter Pettigrew followed his example. I could understand, though, because James Potter's mum was indeed quite the cook. She had made the loveliest dishes appear on the table once they had all sat down and I swear I felt as though I had just tasted a bit of heaven when I took a bite from the most delicious kind of pasta I had ever tasted.

Apparently James Potter has a big thing for pasta as well. His plate was loaded with three different kinds of them and he grinned at me when he noticed I had filled my plate with a healthy amount of pasta as well. 'Yes, I know, Potter. We're alike.' I thought with a roll of my eyes. James seemed to know exactly what was going on in my mind, because he flashed a grin at me before eating his pasta again.

Mrs. Potter seemed to like me very much. She smiled at me a lot and asked me a lot of questions about my family, hobbies and so on. She also told me I had the loveliest red hair she had ever seen and I thanked her for that.

By the time dessert was on the table, I was already practically exploding. The cake Mrs. Potter had made, however, looked so good that I honestly couldn't resist.

"It's good to see you girls don't starve yourselves," said Mrs. Potter and she offered Marlene and I a smile. "I often hear about girls that eat so very little it can't be healthy at all."

I smiled back at her and took another bite of the cake. "They're missing out on all the good things too," I said, "this cake is amazing, Mrs. Potter."

I could tell James was looking at me again, but I decided to ignore it this time. Thinking that I'd much rather enjoy this cake without having to feel embarrassed when I notice the look on James' face.

Okay, I secretly looked at him out of the corner of my eye and he was grinning his lopsided grin again and his eyes sparkled. Was he randomly looking at me as he thought about Quidditch? That could be it, because, like I said before, Potter only looks that way when he talks or thinks about Quidditch. When he's playing Quidditch he looks far more serious, far more determined. Because he wanted to win, I suppose.

I took another bite of the cake and closed my eyes for a moment, letting the wonderful taste fill my mouth and when I opened them again he was looking me straight in the eye and I looked back.

* * *

I sat on the couch, laughing at yet another stupid anecdote Sirius Black had been telling us. My stomach was aching from all the laughing I had done all night and I nearly fell of the couch in the process of this new laughing fit.

James' parents had gone to bed about an hour and a half ago and it was now half past twelve, but I didn't feel tired at all. Probably, because I had a nap earlier that day or is it yesterday? Never mind.

"Merlin," said Sirius and he yawned, "I'm tired, and I'm going up."

"You're a granddad, Padfoot," said James with a grin as Sirius stood up, quickly followed by Marlene, Remus and Peter. Marlene was practically swaying from one side to the other side of the room and I could see she was ready to sleep for at least twelve hours. I smiled. At least, I wouldn't have to get up at seven o'clock in the morning over here.

Soon James and I were the only ones still in the living room, sitting on the couch in silence. I turned my head to look at him and sent him a smile, he did the same for me and he sat up a bit straighter.

"So, having any second thoughts about coming here?" he asked casually.

"Not at all," I said as I looked at my hands and then back up at him again, "I'm feeling very much at home."

"Good," he said and he smiled a somewhat lazy smile, "that's what I hoped."

I smiled back at him and I nodded. "I should probably write Lloyd, though," I said, "to tell him I'm sorry for just… disappearing."

"I think he would appreciate that," James said, "I would if I were him."

I nodded and we were silent for a while, just staring ahead and enjoying the peace and quiet surrounding us. Then James spoke up.

"You know," he said, "all I know is that you're nice. That you're probably the nicest girl I've ever seen. That's all." He stopped talking for a moment and I looked at him. "But I can't get you out of my head."

I held my breath for a second as he leaned forward. I was certain he was going to kiss me. His face was so close to mine, his breath gracing my cheeks and his eyes boring into mine. I was about to close my eyes, a weird instinct of mine, when he placed a soft kiss on my cheek.

"Good night, Lily," he almost whispered. My cheeks were very warm as I watched him go out of the room and I inwardly cursed myself. Since when am I the kind of girl to dump and jump?

There was something about James Potter and I. Something I had just realised probably had always been there. Something a lot like sexual tension… and it terrified me.

If only I had stayed with Lloyd.


End file.
